Despite its sensual connotation, tantric massage is not an erotic massage. Nevertheless, it is a practice that allows you to be better in your body, which can be beneficial for your sex life.
What is tantra?
Eastern philosophy dating back to about 7000 years from the Himalayan-Indian region, Tantra or Tantras, as there are several kinds, has links with Taoism, Hinduism and Buddhism. Sanskrit word from Tan, everything and Tra weave, it advocates an awakening of consciousness and a fullness achieved through the union of feminine and masculine polarities (or yin and yang) and work on the chakras, these seven points. localized energy in the human body. This is what will circulate the energy in the body. And in tantra, energy is sexual energy.
The latter, called kundalini, is symbolized by a snake coiled in the sacrum, the base of the spine and the place of Muladhara, the first chakra. According to Nathalie Giraud-Desforges, a sex therapist and tantra internship organizer, “one of the goals of tantric massage is to unblock this energy so that it rises along the spine to the head, so that the whole body can benefit.”
The unfolding of a tantric massage
There is no tantric massage diploma or legal framework for this practice. The people who provide it have massage, sex therapy, yoga, shiatsu and / or coaching training. Most of the time, people are interested in tantra through readings, articles, travel. They also often deepened their knowledge by following the courses and initiations of experienced specialists, such as Marisa Ortolan and Jacques Lucas, cited at the end of this article.
To choose your masseur or masseuse, it is better to go see someone that you have been advised. He or she will probably wish to discuss with you beforehand, in order to explain you the massage and to probe your motivations. You should also know two things: Tantric massage is not a substitute for medicine or physiotherapy; sexual relations are excluded. Finally, if you meet someone who seems odd, follow your intuition and run away!
The massage can be preceded by a Namaste-Indian slation that is used in particular in the context of yoga – and followed by a thank you. Space is ordered and ritualized: candles, incense, music, heat, soft sheets, everything is done for the comfort of the massage, who is asked to have a shower beforehand. Before the session, it is better to report if you have specific pains, inhibitions or if you are subject to premature ejaculation or anorgasmia.
Lasting about 1h30 and done with oil or talcum, the Tantric massage is received naked: “The whole body is massaged from head to toe, sex is integrated into the massage. is not more or less massaged than another part of the body. In Tantrism all parts of the body are sacred Sex is not taboo,” says Nathalie Cardinal, masseuse. However, there is no obligation: you can totally receive a tantric massage while being only partially naked, with covered sex.
The deployment and circulation of energy in the body can result in tingling, a feeling of electricity, heat. It may happen that the emotion rises and that we shed some tears.
A deep relaxation rather than an orgasm
Sexual, not sexual? “Yes and no,” says Frederic Manthe, relaxologist and energy specialist. “Yes, because the sexual parts are integrated into the massage, no because there is no focus on sexual pleasure.” Indeed, this massage is not intended to give an orgasm. “It’s a massage in consciousness, slow and soft, the goal is to make you aware of your breathing, to feel your whole body, it allows deep relaxation,” says Nathalie. It happens to be excited-it’s accepted and understood-but focusing on breathing will help control that feeling.
The tantric massage allows you to relax and feel better your body. It also has a therapeutic aspect because it allows to put your finger on blockages. The work on the chakras brings out emotions, feelings, behaviors. It helps to identify and work on “knots”, especially on problems of erection and premature ejaculation in men.
This practice changed the life of 31-year-old Laura: “It transformed my life, I had a heavy past, I felt bad about myself, I became aware of my body, I feel better. I let go, it brought back traumatic memories, but it also helped me get rid of it.” Frederic, quoted above, also notes significant before/after: “I had a client who felt like she was transparent in the street and who, after her massage, felt beautiful.”
A precious ally for the couple and the sex life
When you are massaged by a professional, the benefits of the massage are reflected on the couple: “I felt mother but not woman. This practice allowed me to reconcile with my body, but also to break the routine and not said,” says Nelly Germain, now tantra host.
Laura saw her sex life improved: “My partner and I did not want to have sex together anymore, we all knew that there was a drop in sex drive and we went to see a sex therapist, who advised us to have a tantric massage. , to learn to touch us differently, today we are no longer together, but that did not stop me from continuing massages and my journey with Tantra. I have a better sex life because I learned to accept my body and the pleasure I derive from it: touch helps to reconnect with oneself.”
Practiced in two – with an initiation during which you learn to massage each other under the guidance of a specialist-, there is no reciprocity: the one who goes to massage does not wait “his tower”. He gives for the well-being of the other. The massed can fully enjoy the moment, discover erogenous zones. Once again, neither penetration nor orgasm is a goal at the moment.